Things Learned In The Maternity Ward

I learned many things in the many hours I spent killing time and observing the comings and goings in the mommy wing of the hospital.

1) It has the most uncomfortable furniture on the planet. The furniture was all hard. No padding at all and to spend many many hours on it was just cruel and unusual punishment. With the exception of one comfy leather couch in the area where I was updating my blog. That couch was evidently highly prized by the staff because when I was waiting while Audrey was pushing I heard a couple of members of the staff say it was for staff only. It wasn’t marked in anyway to specify that and I wasn’t going to move, that is where I slept.

2) If men had to give birth the human race would die off. Women amaze me. I have a pretty  high pain tolerance, but there is no way I could try to push a cabbage patch kid out of my crotch without someone putting me out. And they do it for one reason, Love. The just shear time and energy they expend is amazing, a guy would get bored and ask for a beer and ask that the TV get tuned to Sportscenter or the Three Stooges. Both are equally entertaining in man world. The baby would never get born.( I think most women would like to punch Eve in the nose)

3) My wife is a a great  labor coach. She was amazing, at the point in time when Audrey was really having problems, Pearl was right there helping her to relax. You could see that she was giving everything she had to distract and refocus Audrey when Audrey was losing control. ( Ben was great to but I was amazed by my wife)

4) That breast pumps on display are funny. This is a photo of the actual display from the nursing center.

I’m sorry but was it really necessary to put this thing on a mannequin and do you really need to pump both breasts at the same time. And one more thing doesn’t this resemble a milking machine.

Steven wants to try a pump just to see what it feels like.

5) While the maternity ward is a place for great joy and happiness, it can also be a place of great sorrow. While we were waiting in the waiting area we overheard a man speaking about a funeral and someone in Iraq, we assumed it was a soldier lost. We were wrong. While we were waiting with great expectation for our Alyssa, their grandson was stillborn. Very sobering. I said a few prayers for them in my mind and prayed for God to protect Audrey and Alyssa. I was suddenly scared for them. God comforted me and protected them. He is so good to us. But I can’t help but wonder, Why? What purpose did the childs death serve? I’m sure God has a reason far beyond what I could even think.

One Response to “Things Learned In The Maternity Ward”

  1. Wow-that was like A to Z…you had me laughing my head off, then feeling sorrow.

    You’re a great writer, Bryan!

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